Can 2 hours of daily travelling still be enjoyable?

After being in Mumbai for almost a year, travelling is no more a pain. While for a beginner getting into a local train seemed to be too scaring, sooner rather than later, the push-in and push-out (read boarding and de-boarding) becomes an integral part of one's daily life. So, when i landed up at Delhi for my summers (and for summer training), i was sure that it can’t be worse than what i had already experienced. But Boy-o-boy, what an amazing experience I was in for!!

My morning travel schedule:
8:29 a.m. –Metro feeder bus from Shalimar area to Netaji Subhash Place metro station
8:51 a.m. – Metro from NSP to Kashmiri Gate
9:14 a.m. – Metro from Kashmiri Gate to Rajiv Chowk
9:30 a.m. – Office-office

But the journey wasn’t tiring. It was actually wonderful. Not the least because everything was good. Like people actually queuing up for a metro train (ask any local train commuter in Mumbai and he’ll be astounded to hear that), clean and well maintained trains and station premises, punctuality in operations, air-conditioned coaches, escalators, smart card to scan-in and scan-out, security arrangements, timely announcements….the list is long. Everything mentioned above is appreciable, no doubt about that. But that is not a KCA of my current post. (Key Concern Area – been long since i last used a jargon in one of my presentations; wheeew, feeling gr8)

What do you do when you have one hour to spend in the morning, and no one to talk? Yeah, no one to talk for one full hour!! For those good-for-nothing-else fellows who would study using some xerox material for some exam, which is months away, please don’t read ahead. Now for those interesting, intelligent, candid, and most importantly observing guys (n gals) who would rather choose something else to make informed investment decision (lolzzz, here comes another over-abused phrase from a would-be-MBA) as to how to spend their precious little time, i have something to share. I chose the time to observe the feminine folk in general. K, kidding, not everyone, only young girls! But this wasn’t the typical NSP (nain-suk prapti; word courtesy: my sis) or a usual checking-out-a-gal. Honestly! I am serious. Gosh, i know it’s difficult to chew but I actually wasn’t checking them out. I was observing them. How each girl is so-so different than the previous one? I mean pick 100 random girls from a metro coach and each one would have a different statement to make. The beauty was mesmerizing, to say the least. So I chose to observe them, obviously – without getting noticed. The feeling was jittery, to begin with. But as I gained experience, I was calmer and cooler, and yeah – more observing.

Details to follow…

How UnLuCkY can one get ?

Had hardly enjoyed home-coming when the bombshell was dropped. Got the info that i am unplaced, again. The "Client requirements", of the company i was placed with, had changed and they were "sincerely apologetic" about not being able to "accommodate" me. Huh! What's the limit of being unlucky, i mean how unlucky can one get? I had my answer with myself. Nothing, on this Earth, is for sure! If ever things were to get bad in future, they couldn't (and wouldn't) get worse than this. So in financial jargon, my luck had "bottomed out". Whoa!

And the count of 201 days, was again ticking... So again rushed back to Mumbai, cooked up stories to convince parents, w/o revealing the actual stuff, lest they would have got (over)worried. Still some ppl say "Why do guys hide things from their parents?"; wHtever!

Anyways, phones were ringing day in-day out. Friends trying to help in whichever way the could have. Placecom members taking time off their own busy schedules (during internship) to help me get placed was really overwhelming. The entire batch was placed, while most of them had already started their summers. And here I was - directionless, and still continuing with the hunt that began on September 19th. Contacts of my contacts were of no avail, still everyone was doing his/her bit (including my roomies who ensured that I do not get too depressed). 

Finally, got myself (with others' help) a decent project with a finance co in Delhi. Now packing my bags for the capital city. Hope i am not in for any more (unlucky) surprises there!

A Surprise visit back home.........

The two weeks since pre-exam time have been a roller coaster ride. First placed after a terribly long wait, then a chance to sit for the  best company on campus this year, then regretting my Physics marks in 12th boards, and finally settling down with all that i hv got (settling after having unsettled quite a few nerves in placecom). 

Internship postponed by a week (yipppppy), rush back home without a reserved ticket. Due to impatience (Hadbadiya, as my dad puts it) i just missed the chance to give my mom a pleasant suprise :( 

Now enjoying (read EATING) like never b4 with 4 meals a day, snacks and high-tea extraaa! Putting on like anything, sure to gain 5 kilos b4 losing it all during my internship. Eatingg time...

p.s: I did repay the principal and the interest at the temple, as per my earlier resolution!

Gone are the sleepless nights......

Finally, one of the longest waits of my life comes to an end. The marathon period saw me appearing in as many as 28 GDs and 8 Interviews, dozens of Pre Placement Talks, but the largest count is that of my CVs. So I sat down to take a count of the bond papers that went into the drain, and it came out to be a whopping 130 copies. The ‘night’ was long. A wait as long as 201 days! In such gloomy economic conditions, the placecomm was doing a terrific job. Getting 120 odd people placed with the corporate behemoths, in a week, is no mean task. But, not everything was in their hands. So, the rest of us had no choice but to wait. To wait for the wait to get over! September passed by. But so did all the succeeding 5 months. It was March 2009. Against the forecast of my roomies (who had all predicted that I would be the first one, amongst the 5 of us, to get placed), I turned out to be the last one. Some wise men rightly commented “You can only make a lucky forecast or a wrong forecast’’. But all these days, I had been feeling defeated.  Every process, every rejection came as a rude shock. How can I be so bad? Didn’t I deserve a placement? Or, didn’t I, at the first place, deserve a seat at NMIMS? Every passing day eroded a layer of hope and self-belief, or whatever little I had of it. The days saw ecstasy and dejection, hypertension and hyper-excitement, nervousness and determination, all interspersed with days of waiting. At one point of time, I was under so much pressure that for a week I saw myself, in my dreams, attending placement processes and screwing them up. While in one dream I saw myself turning out in casuals, in another I saw myself failing to get up from my slumber. My roomies witnessed me murmuring in my dreams, but they never knew what I was talking, or at least that is what they claimed. I was crumbling under Placement-pressure, and still I had to pretend, to the outside world, that I wasn’t. Never before in my life did I realize how a big failure feels. Friends, relatives, family members – everyone was concerned, and reasonably so. Some said “Dude, you aren’t bad at all’’, while other said ‘’Tension mat le Bhai, ho jayega’’. Parents were more worried, knowing that all through my life I had never before felt so lonely and so dejected. They always kept me going. So, I would say to them that I wasn’t worried and that good companies were yet to come. Deep in my heart, I knew that they were aware of the ground realities but little could they have done to help me in this case. To others I would put up other excuses. All this while, I understated the number of placed students, so that they don’t feel….. My Mom used to say ‘’ Jab voh din nhi rhe to yeh din bhi nhi rhenge’’. Well she was right. Lives change, and change for the good. Yesterday was my last interview, which followed a staggering round of finance based quiz. But I had learnt the bitter message of not building hopes, to avoid dejection upon the hoes not being fulfilled. So, when Vohra congratulated me yesterday evening, I went blank. I just didn’t know what happened. I could see all those 6 and a half months flashing before me. I thanked him and left. Finally, I am placed. I have landed up with a good finance profile, in a Multinational. The stipend is low, but it is much higher than what I was ready to settle with at that stage. The project seems to offer tremendous exposure and great learning opportunities. Walking back to my hostel, I was thinking of thanking every person who helped me to get here - Family (comes first), Placecomm (for working day and night selflessly), Placecomm friends (going out of their ways to help me), my “The group’’ friends (for reinforcing my confidence and taking mock interviews), seniors (for their continuous support), roomies (for their optimistic forecasts), relatives (trying to get me placed somewhere), friends back home. The list is long and my heart is heavy.

There were some last moment hitches at some excitingly better placement opportunities that I was to come across. In desperation, I was selfish and mean, and highly unprofessional. But still, my friends stood by my side. I apologize to each one of them, but I don’t thank them, because they deserve much more than a thank you.

When the door of happiness closes, another opens, but often, we look so long at the closed door that we don't see the one which has been opened for us.

Still, gone are the days of worry. Can look forward to some sound sleep. No, got to focus on exams starting early next week, and internship immediately thereafter. NM rocks!

Main aisa kyun hoon..

Scene 1

Year 1993

It all started (or rather ended) with an incident, 15 years ago. I was in Std I. We were supposed to perform on the patriotic number “yeh desh hai veer javano ka”. It was a big group comprising of some 12 boys and girls, dressed in traditional attire – each representing a different culture of our country. I was endowed with a chance to wear a dhoti and having seen my grandfather, I was too eagerly to take dhoti as my dress, while others were fighting for choices. So, the day had come and assumedly, rehearsals had been fine. At the last moment (at least that is how I remember it) we were asked to change some of our dance ‘steps’. Everything went fine, until my wardrobe ‘malfunctioned’. Actually, towards the end, it so happened that everyone was going round and round with the beat oooooooooo (that follows the part yeh desh hai duniya kagehna). I went over the board a way too much and was enjoying myself dangling round-and-round. Suddenly, my dhoti (which my mom had tied up for me) flew open. I was singled out and my dance instructor shouted later “ab kbhi mat bolna ki dance krna hai”. I was a laughing stock for my classmates till months that followed. I thought I would, in due course of time, recuperate from the shock.

Scene 2

Year 1999

My favorite cousin at my Nanighar was getting married and the excitement surrounding his marriage was huge. It was the marriage that so many relatives of mine had been looking forward to. The stakes were high. And the “Geet-sammelan” preparations were on, with huge fanfare. I also succumbed to the temptation, and decided to present a dance on K2H2, a popular recent release in those days. So there was this friend of my sister (yeah, she was pretty….) who came to my place to help me (and my sister) learn the steps. And I was the butt of laughter & ridicule “body itna stiff kyun hai”, ”arey gadhe aise nhi aise kro” and son on and so forth. Finally, after two days of toiling hard, I gave up L Yeah, while all my cousins were performing, I was ruing not having put enough effort and loosing it all! At the same time I had lost hope that I’ll ever learn to dance

Scene 3

Year 2008/09

A decade has passed. From high school I have moved onto a management college.  During a visit to the Times Utsav, there was a promotional training by a reputed dance institute, and they were teaching Salsa. That was one of the first instances where I garnered the courage to do what I wanted to. So threw away my bag, and started the training. And my Enthu level– my friends would vouch for that! I knew I wasn’t any better at the workshop but then who cares. I wanted to dance, I love dancing – so what if my body is stiff, my movements aren’t proper, and I am very conscious. I am not doing for anyone else’s sake. It was me dancing for myself. Or at least I like to think so! So when I was dancing yesterday in the salsa workshop during Euphoria, I was only euphoric about it. I m trying, and am trying hard. Ravinder is contemplating to join full-time salsa classes, and I am thinking of joining him. I hope I am able to. Otherwise, at my rate, it’ll take me another decade to start moving.

"Pappu'' is not all that alone.......

 

Repentance does (not) last long

Every single time I have screwed up (read underperformed) any of my examination papers, I have prayed (and prayed hard) to the Almighty to get me across (read 'get me more marks than I deserve') 'this one time' with a promise 'to study hard(er) hereafter'. Almost all my prayers got answered - be it Geography in Std. VII, Physics in Std. IX, Mathematics in Std. XI, Biology in Std. XII, my BBA entrance test at Symbi, and all my zoology papers across 3 years, and final call from NMIMS (here my praying efforts supplemented those of my Mom)! At times, he was more than generous for letting me top (in final semester at Xavier's) and most of the times I wasn't disappointed.   

Two exceptions did exist - One being my botany (subsidiary) paper in Sem 1 which also happens to be the only academic paper that I flunked in my life :); the other one being my PMTs, where without having toiled I expected my god to see me through. Unarguably, I don't regret not having cleared my PMTs – coz if I would have, I would have , by now, jumped (under stress and immaculate amount of tension)  from  6th floor of some medical college, and worse, I would not have been writing this blog! 

I responded by paying a 'thanksgiving' visit to ‘Pahari Mandir’, a temple of Lord Shiva situated on the hills of Ranchi. The tradition was unbroken, until yesterday.    

Yesterday I was quite relieved not to see my name in the list of Financial Analytics 'disasters'. Besides, I yet again got a GPA which, I feel, was more than what I deserved. So I once again cleared a paper, FA, but this time was denied an opportunity to thank my lord. So I was wondering that as I 'defaulted' on this 'payment', my 'account' with lord might be declared a 'Non-performing asset' and that I might not be entitled to any 'disbursements' in future. (Gosh! I can actually write for some business newspaper).   

So I have decided on two things - the payment which I have just defaulted on would be deposited, with interest, on my next visit to my hometown (core 'banking' solution is yet to reach temples in Ranchi); and  not to rely on borrowings (read prayers) any more to see me through in my examinations. GPAs for second trimester are out and i have shown some marginal improvement. Still, to take my CGPA to a 'respectable' level that sees me through the placement season next year, I have decided to study (hard), and to complement it with my prayers, of course.    

Bol bam!

Mumbai ai'nt all that bad....

This was supposed to be my first post. Accidentally, the contents got replaced while publishing my second post today; am still to come to terms with this irrecoverable loss!.Hope i can pen down my feelings again!